Tag: trauma and loss in adoption

Belonging: The Lifelong Question Many Adoptees Cannot Answer

On By lynellelongIn Abandonment and Rejection, Abuse in Adoption, Adoptee Anger, adoptee emotional burden, Adoptee Intimate Relationships, Adoptee Support, Adoptee vulnerability, Adoptees Educate, adoption and silence, Adoption Attachment, Adoption Conversations, adoption conversations, adoption estrangement, Adoption questions, adoptive family dialogue, adoptive parent defensiveness, Alcohol and drug addiction, Aloneness, Isolation, Citizenship in Adoption, colourblindness in adoption, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, first family separation, Forced separation, Generational trauma, Gratitude in Adoption, Intercultural struggles, Is adoption the best option, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Multiple Identities, Origins Search, Peer support, Post Adoption Support, Racial Mirrors, Racism in Adoption, Return to Birth Country, Return to Birth Country, Searching but no reunion in adoption, Sense of Belonging, Sexual Abuse in Adoption, Survival mechanisms, Therapy, Third Culture Kid (TCK), Transracial Adoption, Trauma in AdoptionLeave a comment

Lynelle discusses why so many intercountry adoptees struggle to feel they belong? A powerful personal reflection on identity, family, race, loss and finding belonging.

Child of their Time, Film Review

On By lynellelongIn Adoptee Anger, adoptee emotional burden, Adoptee vulnerability, adoption and silence, adoption conversations, Adoption Education for Adoptive Parents, Adoption Education for Professionals, Adoption questions, adoptive family dialogue, adoptive parent defensiveness, adoptive parent reflection, adoptive parent responsibility, Adoptive parents silence on illegal adoptions, Aloneness, Isolation, Complexities in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, Finding biological mother, first family separation, Forced separation, Gratitude in Adoption, Grief and Loss, Importance of Connections to Origins, Indonesia, Intercultural struggles, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Motherloss, Not Knowing in Adoption, Origins Search, Politics of Adoption, Racial Mirrors, Racism in Adoption, Return to Birth Country, Return to Birth Country, right to identity, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Sense of Belonging, Survival mechanisms, The Netherlands, Therapy, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in AdoptionLeave a comment

Lynelle reviews Child of their Time, a documentary exploring estrangement, male adoptee voices, adoptive fathers, family pain, apology and the need for support.

Beyond Adoption: Human Rights, Family Separation and Accountability

On By lynellelongIn 1993 Hague Convention, Adoptee Activism, Adoptee vulnerability, adoption accountability, adoption and power imbalance, adoption and silence, adoption conversations, Adoption policy, Adoption questions, adoption reform, adoptive parent defensiveness, adoptive parent reflection, adoptive parent responsibility, Adoptive parents silence on illegal adoptions, Advocacy, Alternatives to Adoption, China, Citizenship in Adoption, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, Family Preservation, Finding biological mother, first family separation, Forced separation, Generational trauma, Gratitude in Adoption, Grief and Loss, human rights abuses in adoption, identity restoration, Illegal Adoption, Illicit Adoption, Impacts to Biological Families, Importance of Connections to Origins, intercountry adoption investigation, Is adoption the best option, legal identity erasure, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Not Knowing in Adoption, Origins Search, Politics of Adoption, Reparation in Adoption, reparative justice in adoption, Return to Birth Country, right to identity, Rights in Adoption, State responsibilities in adoption, Trauma in Adoption, Truth and Reconciliation Commission TRC, UN Joint Statement Illegal AdoptionLeave a comment

Lynelle calls for a new child and family rights system that preserves identity, family, culture, truth, belonging and accountability for all families.

Responses to Sweden’s 2025 Adoption Reckoning

On By Guest BloggerIn Adoptee Activism, adoption and power imbalance, Adoption policy, Adoption questions, adoption reform, Adoption Research, Adoptive Country, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, Illicit Adoption, Impacts to Biological Families, Importance of Connections to Origins, intercountry adoption investigation, Is adoption the best option, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Not Knowing in Adoption, Politics of Adoption, Reparation in Adoption, right to identity, Rights in Adoption, State responsibilities in adoption, Sweden, UN Joint Statement Illegal AdoptionLeave a comment

Sweden’s 2025 Adoption Commission report sparks adoptee, parent and agency responses on apology, support, reform, reparations and accountability.

Conversations Across Adoption – Part 5

On By lynellelongIn Adoptee Anger, adoptee emotional burden, Adoptee Support, Adoptee vulnerability, Adoptees Educate, adoption accountability, adoption conversations, Adoption questions, adoption reform, adoptive family dialogue, adoptive parent reflection, adoptive parent responsibility, Adoptive parents, Alternatives to Adoption, Birth mother choices, Birth Parents Searching, Compensation to Victims in Adoption, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, Exploring adoptive parent journey, Finding biological mother, First family responsibility, first family separation, Forced separation, Generational trauma, Gratitude in Adoption, Grief and Loss, human rights abuses in adoption, identity restoration, Impacts to Biological Families, Importance of Connections to Origins, legal identity erasure, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Multiple Identities, Origins Search, Politics of Adoption, Post Adoption Costs, Post Adoption Support, Reparation in Adoption, Return to Birth Country, Return to Birth Country, reunion trauma, right to identity, Rights in Adoption, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Sense of Belonging, State responsibilities in adoption, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in AdoptionLeave a comment

Adoptee Lynelle and adoptive parent Kristin reflect on reunion, first families, identity, grief, and the responsibilities created through adoption.

When search doesn’t lead to reunion: A Bulgarian adoptee’s reality

On By Guest BloggerIn Adoptee Names, Adoptee vulnerability, Adoption Attachment, Adoption questions, Bulgaria, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, DNA Searching, Finding biological mother, Forced separation, Grief and Loss, Importance of Connections to Origins, legal identity erasure, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Multiple Identities, Not Knowing in Adoption, Origins Search, Post Adoption Support, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Searching but no reunion in adoption, Sense of Belonging, Trauma in Adoption, USA1 Comment

Nicole, adopted from Bulgaria, shares the painful reality of searching for origins, identity, and family—while learning to live without answers.

Adoption Across a Lifetime: Why Reform Must Move Beyond the Child-Centric Lens

On By lynellelongIn 1993 Hague Convention, Adjustment and Transition, Adoptee Activism, Adoptee vulnerability, Adoptees Educate, Adoption Agencies, Adoption Education for Professionals, Adoption policy, Adoption questions, adoption reform, Advocacy, Alternatives to Adoption, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, DNA Searching, Family Preservation, Forced separation, Generational trauma, human rights abuses in adoption, identity restoration, Importance of Connections to Origins, intercountry adoption investigation, Intercultural struggles, Is adoption the best option, Justice Routes, legal identity erasure, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Not Knowing in Adoption, Origins Search, Politics of Adoption, Post Adoption Support, Racial Mirrors, Racism in Adoption, Reparation in Adoption, reparative justice in adoption, Return to Birth Country, Return to Birth Country, right to identity, Rights in Adoption, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Sense of Belonging, State responsibilities in adoption, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in Adoption, Truth and Reconciliation Commission TRCLeave a comment

Lynelle's opening keynote on intercountry adoption, exploring identity, lifelong impacts, and the urgent need to reform systems beyond a child-centric lens.

Agent Orange, Adoption, and the Long Reach of War

On By Guest BloggerIn Adoptee vulnerability, Adoptees Educate, Adoption Attachment, Adoption questions, Advocacy, Birth family trauma, Birth mother choices, Birth Parents Searching, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Finding biological mother, Forced separation, Generational trauma, Grief and Loss, Impacts to Biological Families, Importance of Connections to Origins, Is adoption the best option, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Motherloss, Not Knowing in Adoption, Origins Search, Politics of Adoption, Return to Birth Country, Sense of Belonging, Survival mechanisms, Sweden, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in Adoption, VietnamLeave a comment

Vietnam adoptee Vinh shares his search for family, the impact of Agent Orange, reunion with his mother, and a call to heal trauma and end violence.

Crying out your name

On By Guest BloggerIn Adoptee Artists, Adoptee vulnerability, Birth Parents Searching, Canada, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Grief and Loss, Haiti, Impacts to Biological Families, Importance of Connections to Origins, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Origins Search, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Sense of Belonging, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in Adoption, UncategorizedLeave a comment

A poignant song by Haitian adoptee, Sabine, in Quebec exploring separation, identity, two families, and enduring love between mother and child across distance.

From Silence to Self: An Adoptee’s Song

On By Guest BloggerIn Adoptee Anger, Adoptee Artwork, Adoptee vulnerability, Adoption questions, Adoptive parents, Belgium, Complexities in Adoption, Grief and Loss, Grief and Loss for adoptive parents, Importance of Connections to Origins, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Motherloss, Multiple Identities, Not Knowing in Adoption, Origins Search, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Survival mechanisms, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in Adoption, VietnamLeave a comment

Cao shares a song written across decades, exploring search, grief, identity, and healing after loss, silence, and self-acceptance.

Australia’s History and Silence on Illicit and Illegal Intercountry Adoptions: A Record of Inaction

On By lynellelongIn 1993 Hague Convention, Adoptee Activism, Adoption Agencies, Adoption questions, adoption reform, Adoptive Country, Advocacy, Australia, Birth Parents Searching, Chile, Compensation to Victims in Adoption, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, DNA Searching, Ethiopia, Forced separation, Illegal Adoption, Illicit Adoption, Importance of Connections to Origins, intercountry adoption investigation, Is adoption the best option, Justice Routes, Korea, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Not Knowing in Adoption, Politics of Adoption, Post Adoption Support, Reparation in Adoption, Rights in Adoption, Romania, Sense of Belonging, South Korea, Taiwan, Thailand, Therapy, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in Adoption, Truth and Reconciliation Commission TRC, VietnamLeave a comment

Australia’s silence on illicit and illegal intercountry adoptions and ICAV’s 20-year fight for truth, justice, and recognition of adoptee rights continues

Self Reflections

On By Guest BloggerIn Abandonment and Rejection, Adoptee Anger, Adoptee Artists, Adoptee vulnerability, Art therapy, colourblindness in adoption, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, denial gaslighting minimisation by others, Difficult discussions in adoption, Forced separation, Generational trauma, Gratitude in Adoption, Grief and Loss, Importance of Connections to Origins, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Multiple Identities, Not Knowing in Adoption, Poetry by Adoptees, Racial Mirrors, Russia, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Sense of Belonging, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in Adoption, USALeave a comment

Hannah reflects as a Russian Asian intercountry adoptee on identity, belonging, loss, and the emotional complexities of adoption.

Finding Myself and a Purpose

On By Guest BloggerIn Abandonment and Rejection, Abuse in Adoption, Adjustment and Transition, Adoptee Anger, adoptee in prison, Adoptee vulnerability, Adoptees Educate, Alcohol and drug addiction, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, Generational trauma, Grief and Loss, Hong Kong, Importance of Connections to Origins, incarcerated adoptee, Is adoption the best option, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, New Zealand, Not Knowing in Adoption, Older Age Adoptions, Post Adoption Support, Racial Mirrors, Religion and Adoption, Sense of Belonging, Suicide, Survival mechanisms, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in AdoptionLeave a comment

Mike grew up in New Zealand, adopted from Hong Kong. He struggled as a young child, found his place in the world, and now gives back, to others like him.

What rights should intercountry adoptees have?

On By lynellelongIn 1993 Hague Convention, Adjustment and Transition, Adoptee vulnerability, Adoptees Educate, Adoption Discharge Annulment, Adoption Education for Adoptive Parents, Adoption Education for Professionals, adoption reform, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Deportation of Adoptees, Difficult discussions in adoption, Forced separation, Generational trauma, Gratitude in Adoption, Hague Special Commission, Illegal Adoption, Illicit Adoption, Impacts to Biological Families, Importance of Connections to Origins, Is adoption the best option, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Lived experience leadership, Multiple Identities, Not Knowing in Adoption, Origins Search, Politics of Adoption, Post Adoption Support, Racial Mirrors, Racism in Adoption, Return to Birth Country, Rights in Adoption, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Sense of Belonging, Sexual Abuse in Adoption, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in Adoption, UncategorizedLeave a comment

Lynelle writes about the rights that are to be enshrined in law and practice to create a system that upholds justice, transparency and dignity for every adoptee

What I’ve missed out on in being adopted internationally

On By Guest BloggerIn Adoptee vulnerability, Australia, colourblindness in adoption, Complexities in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, Grief and Loss, Importance of Connections to Origins, incarcerated adoptee, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Not Knowing in Adoption, Origins Search, Post Adoption Support, Racial Mirrors, Racism in Adoption, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Sense of Belonging, Sri Lanka, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in Adoption, UncategorizedLeave a comment

Jonti shares his journey of exploring what his losses have been in being intercountry transracially adopted from Sri Lanka to Australia.

Korea’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission Initial Outcome

On By lynellelongIn 1993 Hague Convention, Adoptee Activism, adoption reform, Adoptive Country, Adoptive parents, Adoptive parents silence on illegal adoptions, Birth Country, Compensation to Victims in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Illegal Adoption, Illicit Adoption, Impacts to Biological Families, Importance of Connections to Origins, Is adoption the best option, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Politics of Adoption, Post Adoption Support, Reparation in Adoption, Rights in Adoption, Search and Reunion in Adoption, South Korea, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in Adoption, Truth and Reconciliation Commission TRC, UN Joint Statement Illegal Adoption, What is an Illegal and Illicit Adoption?Leave a comment

Lynelle discusses the importance of the Korean TRC initial findings to the intercountry adoptee community.

The most invisible adoptees

On By lynellelongIn Abandonment and Rejection, Adoptee Anger, adoptee in prison, Adoptee vulnerability, Alcohol and drug addiction, Australia, Citizenship in Adoption, colourblindness in adoption, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Deportation of Adoptees, Difficult discussions in adoption, Exploring adoptive parent journey, Generational trauma, Importance of Connections to Origins, incarcerated adoptee, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Multiple Identities, Not Knowing in Adoption, Origins Search, Politics of Adoption, Post Adoption Support, Racism in Adoption, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Sense of Belonging, Sri Lanka, Therapy, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in AdoptionLeave a comment

Lynelle raises awareness of those intercountry adoptees who are incarcerated, an unheard voice.

Black Lotus

On By Guest BloggerIn Adoptee Anger, Adoptee Artists, Adoptee Artwork, Adoptee vulnerability, Adoption Attachment, Alternate therapies in adoption, Art therapy, Complexities in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, Generational trauma, Germany, Grief and Loss, Importance of Connections to Origins, Korea, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Multiple Identities, Not Knowing in Adoption, Origins Search, Sense of BelongingLeave a comment

Jonas Haid shares his artwork Black Lotus created and inspired by his own story of adoption from Sth Korea to Germany.

Thoughts from Into the Fire: The Lost Daughter

On By lynellelongIn Abuse in Adoption, Adoptee vulnerability, Adoption Agencies, Adoption Documentary, Adoptive parents, Birth Parents Searching, Birth parents speak out, Compensation to Victims in Adoption, Complexities in Adoption, Critical Thinking in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, Family Preservation, Grief and Loss, Impacts to Biological Families, Importance of Connections to Origins, Is adoption the best option, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Motherloss, Religion and Adoption, Rights in Adoption, Search and Reunion in Adoption, Sexual Abuse in Adoption, Suicide, Trauma in Adoption, USALeave a comment

Lynelle shares her thoughts after watching Into the Fire: The Lost Daughter, on Netflix.

Adopted from Moldova

On By Guest BloggerIn Abuse in Adoption, Adjustment and Transition, Adoptee vulnerability, Adoption and Disability, Alcohol and drug addiction, Complexities in Adoption, Difficult discussions in adoption, Diversity in Adoption, Grief and Loss, Importance of Connections to Origins, Is adoption the best option, Lifelong Impacts of Adoption, Maldova, Origins Search, Sense of Belonging, Special Medical Conditions, Suicide, Therapy, Transracial Adoption, Trauma in Adoption, USALeave a comment

Jacky shares about growing up with fragmented memories of their birth country Moldova and adjustments to fit in with life and family in the USA.