by Sofia Nordgren, born in Bangladesh and adopted to Sweden
My name is Sofia Nordgren. According to my adoption documents, I was born in Bangladesh in 1973, although my exact date of birth has never been verified. I was adopted to Sweden in April 1976 and grew up in a small rural village in Dalarna, far from the capital, Stockholm.
I was adopted into a family that already had a biological daughter who was three years older, according to the information I was given. I grew up in a highly homogeneous environment where there were no other people of colour, immigrants, or adoptees. As a child, I experienced racism and bullying at school, which deeply shaped my sense of identity and belonging.
In 1995, I took a decisive step and moved to Stockholm, where I have lived ever since. The city offered greater access to diversity, adoptee communities, and opportunities for work and connection.
I made my first return journey to Bangladesh in 1999, travelling alone as a young woman, without language skills or local contacts. In 2025, I returned twice more, once in April and again later in the year, as part of my ongoing search for truth, origins, and connection.
Most recently, DNA testing has confirmed that I have found my biological mother, a profound moment in a lifelong journey shaped by intercountry adoption.
A Personal Message of Joy
I want to share something very personal and deeply significant.
I have now received the results of my latest DNA test – a saliva test which confirms with 100% certainty that I have found my biological mother.
A mother who, according to my adoption documents, was declared deceased.
When I received the answer, time stopped.
What came was a quiet, warm inner joy.
As if something inside me finally fell into place.
An inner clarity that is difficult to describe in words.
For a moment, everything else became unimportant.
In April 2025, I also undertook a blood-based DNA test in Dhaka, Bangladesh, which showed a 99.99987% probability of biological motherhood.
I have now received double confirmation, through two completely independent DNA methods, one via blood and one via saliva.
I chose to take the saliva test directly from my mother, with my own eyes, to finally release the last remnants of doubt.
As a nurse, I know how tests are done, but this wasn’t just about knowledge.
It was also a deep internal journey.
My doubts and my insecurities are now gone.
I have recently learned about the concept of “coming out of the fog”, and I feel that I am slowly starting to come out of the fog.
Things are clearing up.
Inside me.
In my story.
At the same time, more emotions are stored.
The grief of all the years I’ve missed with my biological mother is extremely painful.
Anger.
Sorrow.
Longing.
And gratitude.
All at the same time.
The road here has been long and demanding.
I have travelled alone several times, without language, without local contacts, in a completely different culture and religion.
It has cost time, strength, money, sweat – and many inner tears.
We are different in many ways.
And it hurts.
But our differences are not a lack of connection, they are the result of never having been able to live our lives together.
We grew up in different environments, cultures, and contexts.
The language between us is a major challenge, and it has been painful.
Now we are both older.
What the continuation will look like, I don’t yet know.
But I know there will be a continuation.
To fully tell the whole process, how I did it, what happened, and what I felt along the way, does not fit into a post like this.
I have shared parts before, in books and newspaper articles, and there will be more to come in the future.
For now, I just want to share this:
I have found my mother.
She is alive.
And it is now confirmed, twice over.
Resources
Searching for my family in Russia
Searching for my family in Romania
Searching for my family in China
Searching in intercountry adoption by adoptee experts (webinar)
Searching for my family in Vietnam
Searching for my family in Colombia
Searching for my family in the Philippines
Searching for my family in South Korea
Searching for my family in Sri Lanka
Abandoned: its meaning and context (Ethiopia)
Reunification with my Colombian family
Realities of adoption and reunion
Reunion and Beyond (webinar)