Adoption is not heroism. It does not fight poverty, disease nor the root causes of inequality. Adoption doesn't even raise awareness about the real causes of poverty, inequality, parent-child separations, disease or social immobility. Instead it creates idolatry of those who look to adoption in a world which stigmatises infertility, disease, poverty and poor access …
Tag: adoption experience
Celebrating Secrets and Sadness
Adoptee birthdays are a day of celebrating secrets and sadness, a complex day of emotions reminding us we are not with the ones who birthed us.
Embracing our Origins
We explore the intercountry adoptee journey to embrace our ancestry.
Returning to Vietnam
Kate shares about her return trip to Vietnam, her birth country.
Why I’m Not Going Back: One Intercountry Adoptee’s Perspective
Intercountry adoptee shares about racism and xenophobia.
Not My Adopted Child!
If my mum read my posts about adoption, she'd think, "Not Juliette, not my daughter!" I've done the emotional work because I know my parents haven't and never will. Brexit tore my family apart when my parents voted and arguments revealed just how little they understood they had an Asian immigrant daughter. I struggled and …
Life Experience impacts our Views about Adoption
Romanian intercountry adoptee shares.
Thoughts on being a part of The Hague Illicit Practices Working Group
ICAV invited to be an Observer at the Hague Working Group.
Inner Work for Adoptees
One of the highlights in travelling to the Netherlands last month was to finally meet in person Hilbrand Westra, a fellow intercountry adoptee born in South Korea and adopted to the Netherlands, whom I have liaised and worked with since the beginning of ICAV. Not only did I get to meet him in person, share …
A Filipino Adoptee’s Plea to Not Be Erased
Dear Intercountry Adoption Board (ICAB) of the Philippines, I'm a 33-year-old Filipino American adoptee and I refuse to be erased. I refuse to be ignored. I was born in the Philippines and it was not my choice to leave. But it is my choice to return as an adult and to regain my citizenship. Because, …
The Importance of Racial Mirrors
The importance of Racial Mirrors in intercountry adoption.
Trauma Triggers
Why do some adoptees need to be on the defensive, overly criticizing, put each other down, and posture themselves as aggressors? I understand and respect that we all have varied opinions, thoughts, and information on a very complex subject. We all have unique stories and ideas to share. I think people do this because their …
Exceptions to the Rule
A post from an adopter on my Facebook page got me thinking about an issue. Is there an exception to the rule where intercountry adoptions should be allowed? The woman stated that, “All 13 of my children from China have special needs. Some pretty severe. One thing for sure ... no-one in-country stepped up to …
Finding Love
Denny walked into the library and I greeted him at the circulation desk. Immediately, I felt that he was my soulmate. Later on, I found out he felt the very same thing. He'd visited a few more times, and then disappeared for a few months. In that time, I started learning how to fly by …
Crane Mimicry
Can a famous example of conservation teach us anything about adoption? Most people can’t see a correlation but I do! Less than a hundred years ago, there were just 16 whooping cranes left in North America. These beautiful majestic birds were near the brink of extinction. Men who over hunted and destroyed the bird’s habitat …
Stranger Than Fiction
In third grade, I was in Mrs. Peterson’s class and given the assignment to do a family history project. I asked my adoptive parents about the project and they stated my Aunt Eirene had worked on the family tree and traced back across several hundred years. My family automatically skipped the fact that my own …
What Adoptees Lose in Intercountry Adoption
I normally tiptoe around adoption and never say the A word because people just don't respond well to "adoptee anger". But during the month of November, I feel it is appropriate to air my feelings on what I have anger about, in intercountry adoption. I hate that our original identities are ignored and get obliterated …
Continue reading What Adoptees Lose in Intercountry Adoption
Four Murdered Chinese Adoptees
Joey shares after the death of 4 chinese adoptees.
Being Alone
I get up in the morning and I try. That's basically what it's like every morning as an adult adoptee. Whenever I look back in my mind, my past stretches past a million acres of difficult terrain that's emotionally challenging and left psychological imprints on me. An adoptive family I never got that close with. …
Lost Siblings
Remembering My Youth As a child, I remember playing near the burn pits that laid by the small village of unpainted traditional Korean style homes (Hanoks). They nestled below a small outcrop of mountains, located in central Korea. My brother grabbed my hand to take me to see the prize he had found lying in …
Not Existing
Lynelle shares how difficult it can be not knowing who we are or having any documentation.
Remembering Origins
A few days ago, I was invited to attend the filming of Sarah Henke to cook with a famous TV Chef from Korea 전현숙. He came to Germany to interview Sarah, a KAD chef who works at a restaurant and recently earned the coveted Michelin Star. During the filming of the program all guests were …
An Adoptee’s Take on “Crazy Rich Asians”
There are a lot of opinions and pieces surrounding Crazy Rich Asians right now. I am simply adding to the chorus, but from a slightly different perspective as a Chinese American intercountry adopted person. As an adoptee who watched Crazy Rich Asians, it is hard to describe all of the feelings I felt while sitting …
The Rights of the Child
UK transracial adoptee shares her thoughts on being adopted.